Thursday, September 20, 2007

I do so miss friends and lovers who never managed to make it to Old Age. All their troubles have ended. My woes and unresolved business with them linger, my stale and bitter reward for outliving them. I feel an urge to wish I could talk with them, but actually, I just wish they were still here.

Denial isn't all bad the way everybody makes it out to be. A reporter phoned to get a reaction from John O'Hara about George Gershwin's sudden young death. O'Hara said: "I don't have to believe it if I don't want to."

So sometimes I try to think of my friends and lovers as if they've just moved to Minnesota or Finland -- hard to visit, hard to get on the phone. But they're still alive and I could get lucky next week and see them and talk to them and have dinner with them again, and it will be just the way it all used to be. I could hear the sound of their laughter again.

In memory of friends and lovers

Remembered by Bob Merkin, USA